Towanda Tuesday: Women of the Past Series Anna Bilińska

After my "April Away" from Towanda Tuesday I thought I would kick off the first Tuesday of May with something different.

I've been studying amazing and somewhat unknown women artists of our past, and I wanted to share them here as resident Towanda's.

Anna Bilińska

Excerpt from Frances Borzello's: Seeing Ourselves Women's Self-Portraits

The Polish artist Anna Bilinska paints herself taking a break from her work. She is convincingly scruffy. She has not bothered to remove her apron, and, although her hair began the day pinned up, some tendrils have escaped. As she sits on the homely bentwood chair, she bends forward to stare at the spectator, a bunch of brushes held across her apron in one hand and her palette hanging down at the extremity of the other . . . This pose of Bilinksa’s had not been seen before. She has set herself down in front of the curtain which forms a background for the model. The combination of transitory pose and backcloth is an understated but witty way of telling the spectator that she has become—but only temporarily—the model not the artist.

I am so drawn to this portrait of this woman. The light and dark of this painting is so beautiful. The apron and the paint brushes, her mussed hair and the backdrop make this such a beautifully honest painting in a time where overly sweet and porcelain doll paintings were the rage. I am so in awe of women that would paint themselves as is in times when it was not popular to do so. No social media hashtags to join ranks with... no groups to join.. no causes...no trends...just pure desire & artistic license to paint as is. 

This is magnificent in so many ways.

 Hope she inspires you as she inspires me.

 Thanks for stopping by.

{Allowing} and Tina Turner....

Fall.

I did just that. I allowed myself to fall into Sacred Space this past month.

Answering questions regarding space for myself and allowing room to grow...and making it sacred.

Falling pushed way past my comfort zones and into terrain un-ventured.

I fell back into ways that came naturally, 2nd nature as it were. 

And it was delicious and it was uncomfortable and it was scary and you guessed it, perfect.

Here's what I learned.

1. Say Yes

2. Show up

3. Work at being present the WHOLE time 

Three relatively easy steps right?

Wrong. 

Lets FALL into those Lion Hearts....

Saying yes- this means that you have to push past time, money and the importance of you creating sacred space. This means borrowing money, putting things on credit cards before the holiday. Taking vacation days that are so precious or more so sick days. Work will always be there. And the money that you are making to work should go towards sacred space, towards your growth.

Showing up-  This means not backing out, backing down, giving in, making excuses good or bad...because we are all so very good at that yes.  Obligations for the family will always be there. Your obligation to your family should be to take time for your growth and sacred space. Period.

This means getting on planes that you're afraid of, dealing with tight spaces, crowds, panic attacks, hustle bustle. This means keeping the YES alive.

Being Present- You've said yes. You've showed up. Now....can you stay present? I know you want to but are you letting your mind make that decision? 

That's the fight.

Mind/heart Mind/heart back and forth back and forth. For me personally it tends to exhaust me...if I let it. I have this inner dialogue that I've discovered lately. "Yes yes mind, I hear you- it's not your turn, it's the hearts turn. Wait your turn".

I have learned in Sedona and then with this Sacred Space trip in Oregon that it's as easy as catching yourself in your head to just bring yourself back to the heart. 

Of course it's easy to do in the beauty that is Oregon. 

Reminders everywhere that this season is fleeting and there are these moments and colors that are so temporary... just like you Lion Heart.

What types of reminders can you put into this to bring you back to center? 

The last night in Rhododendron it was a stormy one, and the lights on the property outside went out. We prepared our sacred space, lit every candle in the county, found christmas lights and strung them everywhere. Made a delicious meal and then danced to Tina Turner for hours.

It was a moment in  time I will never ever forgot Lion Hearts.

My reflection dancing back at me in all the windows of the house, singing and dancing to the Fierce and Unapologetic Tina Turner.

"you better be good to me.... it's how it's GOTTA be now"

I sang at the top of my lungs and realized...that I was singing to myself.

I was dancing to myself.

I was allowing myself to create this space, allowing my growth, allowing my time, allowing allowing allowing.

To sing "bad" to dance "bad" to let it "all hang out" to giggle like a 5 year old to cry and let the tears come WITHOUT apology.

And I did it with the support of these two women and it was the most natural thing in the universe. To allow them to take care of me and visa versa.

Beautiful thing Lion Hearts when you allow.

Say yes. 

Show up.

Stay Present.

:Morale of the story: 

Sing More Tina Turner at the top of your lungs and dance without apology.

In fact....live your life without apology...okay Lion Heart? 

Allow The Fall.

The Grotto of the Sorrowful Mother  

Oh Mother.... 

Sylvia & Kathleen: Resident Goddess'

Wear your Crown Lion Hearts

I love you two...thank you for everything

View from my Room 

Sacred

 ===== Other Life Stuffs=====

Some of you know that I have been dealing with a chronic infection on my right leg. Well in Oregon creating sacred space I broke out in 2 more infections. I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis with vasculitis and pyoderma gangreosum. This is inflammation in my body causing bursted blood vessels in my foot and lower legs to form sores and they didn't know what it was for so long that they had become necrotic (flesh was dying).  I am currently taking steroids to deal with the inflammation and blood work will be analyzed in the next week or so. There is comfort in finally KNOWING what's going on. There is of course all the other stuff that comes along with this that is scary, sad, disappointing. However... I have the support of both my families and all my friends and I feel confident that I will be able to live with this...and allow whatever is coming to just come. 

Thank you for your love and support it means every single little thing to me Lion Hearts.

And here are more pictures from my very blessed life that I would love to share with all of you. I trust you had a very Thankful Thanksgiving. As we step into Christmas lets remember to Allow...and play Tina Turner whenever possible.

My beautiful sister Monique & Nephew B and the Paparazzi

lots of BBQ's and bonfires!

Where's your tool belt babe? Making my art table!

Adam and Me

This baby just walked into our office and I tried to eat her because she's perfect Miss K

My co-worker Amanda I love you so much

Filling in the Blanks

Audaciously Artsy... what I want outta 2013

Hello yous !
I've been trying to avoid the ol' year in review blog post. Trying not to be cliche... trying to keep quiet a bit..reflect, review, revise, relive.
A week and a half into this new year it's been an emotional one. Personally things are wonderful, goals I've made are coming to fruition, my children are happy and doing well.. my husband is a saint...and my love of mixed media is something I'll be able to share with hundreds in a few short months with
21 secrets 2013 launching.

Here's what I want outta 2013.

I want more moments. Moments where I am not overwhelmed with the tasks of the day, but overwhelmed by a sensory overload. Touch, smell, taste, hear. I want more moments to just sit on my tongue and linger so I can savor every last tid bit morsel.
I want more lingering. More loitering. More meandering. More lollygagging.
More... time to just be and let be. To settle into my skin. Fat, thin.. sagging... firm doesn't matter.
Time to marinate in gratitude. Let it permeate through all things... let my thankfulness for this life just ooze off of me like warm icing on a big cinnamon roll (yum).
More permission to do, feel, say what my heart scratch that what my LION HEART says it wants.
Gettin' down to the nitty gritty. More time to dance, fearless, uninhibited, wildly free.

:WORD OF THE YEAR: 

  Audacious lively; unrestrained; uninhibited:

Oh yeah. Last year was LionHeart so I am thinking this is along the same lines... and I loved loved loved last years word... it seriously brought my back to it so many times over the course of the year...where I had to tap into that word and use it to propel me through.

This year is no exception. And I take with me last years word as well.

Audaciously Lion Hearted.

Share with me on facebook Hand Over Heart Studios fan page would ya? What are gettin' outta 2013?

Join me for 21 Secrets you can sign up now it's open...go! I'll wait..... didja go yet?

21 artists...months and months of artist fun, tempting you, techniquing you, loving you, supporting you? What's not to love my LionHearts? GO!  See you over there!!! I'll be teaching you ((psst click on the link)

{ACCEPT}ional art. The art of Accepting...you. Accepting all of you. Where you are right now. In as is condition. Plus there is a giveaway involved.. couple more days left on that so jump on it :) I'll be sweetening the pot with some art books....oooo secrets OUT!

And there is always room for: 

I stand in awe at the light my life has.  And I am aware of how very blessed I am to have another year for {ACCEPT}ional opportunities to be inspired. 

Heart that matters most. 

Much love Lion Hearts!