Towanda Tuesday: Women of the Past Series Anna Bilińska

After my "April Away" from Towanda Tuesday I thought I would kick off the first Tuesday of May with something different.

I've been studying amazing and somewhat unknown women artists of our past, and I wanted to share them here as resident Towanda's.

Anna Bilińska

Excerpt from Frances Borzello's: Seeing Ourselves Women's Self-Portraits

The Polish artist Anna Bilinska paints herself taking a break from her work. She is convincingly scruffy. She has not bothered to remove her apron, and, although her hair began the day pinned up, some tendrils have escaped. As she sits on the homely bentwood chair, she bends forward to stare at the spectator, a bunch of brushes held across her apron in one hand and her palette hanging down at the extremity of the other . . . This pose of Bilinksa’s had not been seen before. She has set herself down in front of the curtain which forms a background for the model. The combination of transitory pose and backcloth is an understated but witty way of telling the spectator that she has become—but only temporarily—the model not the artist.

I am so drawn to this portrait of this woman. The light and dark of this painting is so beautiful. The apron and the paint brushes, her mussed hair and the backdrop make this such a beautifully honest painting in a time where overly sweet and porcelain doll paintings were the rage. I am so in awe of women that would paint themselves as is in times when it was not popular to do so. No social media hashtags to join ranks with... no groups to join.. no causes...no trends...just pure desire & artistic license to paint as is. 

This is magnificent in so many ways.

 Hope she inspires you as she inspires me.

 Thanks for stopping by.

<> Journal Entry today I wrote<>

I think staying in the flow of creativity is Hope. It's a steady stream of hope. It is a trust fall of sorts. It's a shedding of the skin down to the star dust of our sacred selves and setting fire hope.

At least that is what I envision hope.

Not just the word slapped on shabby chic wood signs in every boutique downtown, but an actual spirit in things. It's got me through many a dark and stormy lone wolf night.

It carries me through on its Bison Back today.

I journeyed with Pixie Lighthorse today in our first meeting of Sisters on a Journey 2016

I was hoping to share the Journey here but it was deeply personal and something that I will have to keep going back to in the weeks to come to suck the marrow from, make sure all the medicine is put in my medicine pouch for future journeying!

I am a fortunate daughter of the universe to be with these women at this time and you can join us too at any time.. I hope you do.

This Art Journal page came out after my Journey work... actually about 4-5 pages came out and I will be working on those in the month to follow until we all meet again next month. All Love <3

<>

---------------------------------------------------->

Follow me on instagram @kitty_o_hello 

Change happened. Goodbye 9-5. Hello Dreams.

Music floods my house these days along with the smells of  fresh cut wood (thanks to Standing Man * my hubby* in his wood shop ) and gesso.
I am moving at my own pace, no longer waking to an alarm clock.
It's taken me 2 months to not wake startled or sick to my stomach, thoughts racing about money and time spent or wasted.
I've literally been physically sick for close to 5 weeks, a detox from the corporate world I'm convinced.
So with the holidays over, the last of the Christmas decorations put away and the glitter vacuumed up I'm finding a new rhythm to things.
Here's a few things I will not allow:

1. Guilt on sleeping in. I'll let my body sleep if it needs it.
2. Racing thoughts about things I cannot control or past issues that no longer serve me upon waking
3. Staying in PJ's past 10ish (this is a personal thing... no judgment all day PJ wearers)

 The rest I'm making up as I go.

With exciting artistic collabs on the horizon I'm not only learning how to manage the day to day but also manage my time as my own boss.
Liberating, yet terrifying.

And so stay tuned for some juicy tid bits and nuggets of yum!

::Artist Interview:: Soul Food {GIVEAWAY}

Sign up for 

{SOUL FOOD}

a new Mixed Media Class read more about it 

HERE

====================================================
It is my honor to be apart of such a heart centered group.
It is my INTENTION to bring a clearer understanding for you to ACCEPT where you are in your art process...and in turn let the trickle into ACCEPTANCE of where you are in your life.

You are beautiful Souls~ Lion Hearts <3

Want to enter the Giveaway for 1 spot in Soul Food for yourself or for a gift?
It's easy

CLICK HERE
1. Like my facebook page would ya?
                      2. Tell me what FEEDS your CREATIVE SOUL!
3. SHARE SHARE SHARE!
Giveaway will run until November 1st
Winner will be announced on HandOver Heart Studios facebook page!

Awakening to Your Divine Self

Wisdom and Love from your Fearless Sisters

:: Oracle Deck ::

44 card deck of original art from around the world!

Acceptance, trust, bravery...power. These are some of the words of intention for your beautiful life. This Oracle Deck is made up of 39 artists from around the world of original art just for you. 

I am fortunate to be apart of this amazing group of heart centered women. 

Secure your deck today!

Pre-sale special until October 4, 2013.  Receive your Deck for $19.95 USD plus Shipping and Handling if not local.  Estimated availability is early December 2013.

Regular Price $29.95 plus S&H after October 4, 2013
***Only available for US orders only.  Contact me if you are in a different Country as we have Artists all over the World

It is my INTENTION to spread the joy of acceptance in your life. 

It is my INTENTION to remind you of your gifts in your life

It is my INTENTION to come to peace about all shame in your life

It is my INTENTION to come from a place that is completely truth and heart centered and offer my card of 

INTENTION 

Use these cards for creativity

Use these cards for clarity

Use these cards for powerful messages during mediation

Use these cards for readings for others

It is our hope that you will use these cards in pure love awakening to the true self.

These are a powerful, inspiring group of women and I just know this you will fall in love with this deck!

COPY PASTE BELOW AND EMAIL ME AT

HANDOVERHEARTSTUDIOS@GMAIL.COM

{copy/paste in email}

NAME:

ADDY:

HOW MANY DECKS:

{yes or no}

PAYING WITH PAYPAL:

MAILING CHECK:

I UNDERSTAND ESTIMATED DELIVERY IS EARLY DECEMBER:

I HAVE SHARED YOUR LINK:

INTERESTED IN A GIVEAWAY:

{thank you so much everyone I am over the moon excited to share this with you}

And oh what a day it was....  

Beautiful Ojai trip yesterday, the sun was shinning, the water was clear. I made my way down the 101 California Coast with anticipation in my heart, and a belly full of nerves.
Painting. With others. Whom I don't know. Painting from The Source. What an adventure.
I left early, hoping to get a jump on the day, to be able to have a moment to ground my self before entering the studio. However life happened, I got a tummy ache, I took a wrong turn. I was not "late" but I was not "early" as I wanted... I like to be early. I like to watch others walk in, not the other way around.
I got there, right at 10:00. Everyone else was there but me. Instant panic. Instant discomfort. Instant urge to flee. I was greeted by a small woman with a beautiful accented voice who directed me to the room to place my things. I then made my way back into the Studio/Living Room of Aviva Gold, my "mid-wife" for the day. What a gorgeous human being. The living room was chock full of affirmations everywhere I looked. STAY ON YOUR EDGE. STAY IN THE PROCESS.
We were all there. We were all unsure, we were all a bit awkward, but we were all there for the same thing.... To Paint. To Heal. To faciliate. To Witness.

The day went quickly, I felt waves and waves of emotion, as I usually do in a group setting, picking up on others emotions, insecurities, anger, discomfort.
I went through waves of nausea, headache, fatigue and severe bladder and lower back aches.
I stayed with the process, stepping back every so often to look at my painting, to listen to her...to understand her needs, her desires, her Lion Heart.
I painted an owl woman, a bird, flowers, sky, and a huge face with blood dripping from her lips..it was scary, it disturbed me a bit...but I felt at ease. I felt a deep connection to the imagery. I fell in love with her. I stayed on MY EDGE, by pushing through the embodiment of the painting, a ritual type of practice that yields the paintings energy through your body. It was prophetic. It was terrifying. It was sacred. It was necessary.
I left feeling a sense of gratitude. I left with a bigger sense of self. I left with new air in my lungs.
I left without my painting.

ouch.

And as I drove away the headache that I no longer endured hit my like a ton truck. Full fledge migraine headache with the dry heaves. I had to pull over 4 times on the freeway, to rest...to cry....to close my eyes from the pain. I had to eventually call my husband to come and get me...as I could not drive any longer. Half way through this horrible trip home I realized I had left her...and I immediately thought...THIS IS WHY YOU ARE SO SICK!
It's Okay...I left it for a reason. I left it because I need to return to Ojai...I need to stay on my edge. I will see her again, and when I do it will be a lovely reunion. Together again in Beautiful Sacred Ojai with Aviva again as my mid-wife.

Thank you to all who witnessed my breakthroughs, my triumphs and for seeing Me. As Me.Lion Hearts Stay on your Edge. Stay in the Process. Find your Sacred Ojai!!

You sure must be strong...

Love such a simple thing that we do... with nothing to prove....
The Shins- Simple Song 

if you haven't heard it. Go. Listen to it. Let it marinate. Listen to it in a loop.
It does the soul good. Seriously. Go.
You're welcome.

This week plagued with 2 major migraines. Not fun. Hubby working out of town. Not fun.
Art journaling. Fun. I think I am .. dare I say.. finding my palette. Finding my "style" my "nitch".
Or not. I dunnow. Why do we have to label things. It's just a necessity really isn't it? To fit it all into organized and neat and easy identifiable containers.

I miss. ALl the time just miss.
I miss my kids being little.
I miss my son walking down the hallway and saying in his funny voice "Hey Mob"...
I miss my daughters crooked little ear and the way she'd yell for me when she was hungry... her fragile little body, constantly in my arms.. she was like an appendage.
Severed.
It's something I am really struggling with.
Trying not to fill the void with food. That was hard to type. I almost wanted to hit the backspace but decided I better leave it.

I have no idea what I will do when Rhiannon moves out.
The thought just crushes me, and leaves me with an icy cold feeling in my chest.
Deep breath. One thing at a time Kitty. Be nice to yourself. Don't overwhelm yourself. Be kind.

Are you being kind to yourself where you are?
WIth the upmost care and attention, love and kid gloves?
I recommend it.
It's highly underrated.

"Don't go thinking you gotta be tuff and play like a stone.. could be that there's nothing else in our lives so critical..as this little home"....
The Shins. Simple Song.
go and have a listen.
and be good to yourself.
right now.
wherever you are.

Open up...

"There's a bird that nests inside you..sleeping underneath your skin, yeah when you open up your wings to speak I'd wish you'd let me in"....
-Counting Crows/ August & Everything After...

An Original by: Me :)

The album that started it all. My love affair with anything and everything lyrically genius.
Actually that isn't entirely true. I can remember distinctly having my own "boom box" in 3rd grade and listening to love songs on the coast when I was supposed to be sleeping..and memorizing words. They were fascinating to me.. that words could be formed into a song that said everything you've ever wanted to say. YOu could say that I was a passionate kid. All heart. And you would be correct.
By the time I was in 5th grade I knew every single note worthy , cheesy love song "on the coast" that there was. Jen would write in and express her love for Jonathan with a ballad from Chicago...and I would intently listen... quite as to not disturb my father would would "have killed me" if he found out I wasn't sleeping..and I would write the lyrics.
In 6th grade I got a double cassette player and I could record RIGHT OFF THE RADIO! It was so rad.
And I would record it...and listen to it over and over and study the lyrics..what they meant...and why love inspired so much happiness and so much pain...and mostly so much art.

It was a saving grace for me..in a tumultuous and uncertain time... lyrics/music got me through the teen years.. scouring through my fathers old LP collection and discovering time and time again Elton Johns goodbye yellow brick road..just sounded better when you could hear it spin on the record player.
And Led Zeppelin would take me to places I was sure were other worldly..completely sober.. however willing to receive it's transformative majic through lyric...and heart stopping, wrenching song.

I painted this picture for my best friend of 18 years.
I hope she receives it well...as it is my intention to show to her that I love her more than I could ever express in any song, poem, lyric or limerick.
I had to do it through gesso, paint, ink, stamps and lots and lots of patience.

I hope you love it Tee.

Metaphorically speaking...

taken in Cambria California <3 it was a great day

Butterflies are a perfect set up for metaphors.
My favorite butterfly reference is a line from one of my very favorite bands Counting Crows;

"the butterfly in reverse here is me"...

I feel like that often times. Huge leaps forward and then, something sets me back.
A lot of the time it's just me getting in my own way.
Me. Just in reverse.
I want to take this moment to do a shout out to the reverse in me.
Sometimes you have to go in reverse to reposition yourself to go forward.
So with that in mind I will accept, not judge & remember the process.
This marriage to my Art Side, blooming and teeming with possibility will..eventually have to go in reverse.
Acknowledgment is the first step right?

Fly my butterflies.
Reverse as needed.

Embracing the notion...

Poinsettias are beautiful aren't they?

This morning I came to a realization.


Art is like a marriage.
You put your blood sweat and tears into it.
You get out of it what you put in.
Patience, loving kindness ... space... unconditionalness, truth.
Steady foundation for any prosperous, healthy marriage.
Art is like a marriage.

You might be saying, Yes yes we know this...
well me too little darling. Like I know that milk goes bad if you leave it on the counter.
It was knowledge. Seemingly useless.
Until this morning.

B A M .

Driving on my country road to work. The sun thawing out the frozen hillside, horses and cattle grazing while the Red tail Hawk sat like Watchers... providing safe passage...
it hit me.

So, I intend to cultivate this seed of my newfound  knowledge and let it grow.
Yes yes I will let it run dry at times, and weeds will get to it..but it will never die.
And it will always forgive my trespasses...my subtle neglect, because we are married.
I will hold up art.
And art will hold me up.
Art Marriage.

I am embracing this notion...-Lion Hearted